“…no second tier doctrine is going to keep us apart;
there’s too much love in this Pentecostal heart.”

* You do need to be on the same page in terms of roles within the marriage (the complementarian thing)

* You do need to be on the same page as to which church you’ll go to

* You don’t necessarily have to be on the same page in terms of theological detail. No couple will agree on every jot and tittle of the law anyway, and there are a few churches around which are both reformed and Charismatic.

That was a very solid presentation you made and it gave me some insights that I will be able to use in my own life.

The only thing I would’ve changed would’ve been to change the song from Conway and Loretta to the tune of Johnny and June Cash’s, “Long-legged Guitar Pickin’ Man.” ‘You Pentecostal woman. You Calvinistic man. Well we can work this out, uh-huh, yes ma’am I think we can.’

In Christ,

John

I work in a Christian college setting. It is astounding to me how many students are either spiteful toward people with other legitimate theological beliefs or cynical about Christianity because they have only heard one side their whole lives. They have never seen the unity that exists despite our diversity of theological perspectives. I mean, how beautiful could this marriage be? It would help if more Reformed churches viewed their PCA bretheren down the road like as united with them as a husband is to a wife, and vice versa.

Perfect theology doesn’t save us, a perfect Savior does. If they can agree on that, congrats to the new bride and groom.

I think that Calvin faces deep challenges that come with the package of headship. As the leader, this man is responsible for the family’s spiritual growth. If Calvin is wholly committed to his wife in love and truth, it’s going to be a difficult road in his mind and heart as he rightly divides the truth while always keeping in mind the deep differences in practice and tradition between him and his Wife. Calvin has to tread carefully so as to maintain that respectable, trustworthy and bride-honoring character of his through all his doings. I perceive that to be a potentially heavy burden. And I believe that Aimee faces the same thing as a husband-honoring Wife. They’re both in for a ride together on this one.

To Aimee, you said “If you would plan to whisper to your children, “Don’t tell Daddy but really serious Christians get slain in the Spirit…” then call off the engagement.”

If Aimee should call off the engagement (and she should!) if she would contradict her husband’s beliefs on Spirit gifts to future children, then so much more should they call off the engagement if they would contradict each other about the way of salvation itself, right?

The case would have been much more easier if Calvin said that Aimee was a member of a mainline liberal church and believed that Scripture was only a human document and that Jesus died not as a propitiatory sacrifice for our sins but as a victim of human injustice.

But, alas, we only get to tackle difficult cases in our spiritual ministry.

I would add one thing: Every marriage faces difficulties and tangential differences like this are often where these difficulties are manifest. Mutual submission, she to his headship and he to her sanctification, is the key to meeting any of the difficulties in marriage and would be the key to keeping this issue from being a foothold.

I don’t believe he was dissing the hymn…which is one of my favorites too! But you have to admit it can be sung that way (we use the Trinity hymnal but use alternate tunes frequently to avoid the tunes no one knows or the “dirges”).

And, actually….I’ve been known to raise my hands while singing hymns such as It is Well With My Soul and How Sweet and Awful is the Place. I’m such a bad Reformed Baptist ;-) And yes, I sit next to one of my elders and his family…

But oh, please oh please, don’t pile onto “How Sweet and Awful Is the Place.” I recognize the “organ-dirge” element, but this is one my favorite hymns, so beautifully speaking of the wonders of electing love and the spread of the gospel to the ends of the earth.

=-)

Thank you for sharing this with us Dr. Moore!

Unique exceptions to this might be Billy and Ruth Graham, but I’m thinking God’s hand on their lives was so unusual that their love is a model but not necessarily their church lives.

Thanks for writing this. May many couples consider theological concerns as much - or way, way more - as they consider financial philosophies or who’s a night or morning person :-)