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Does Male Headship Lead to Violence Against Women?

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You may have seen her when she dropped her fourth-grade son off at Vacation Bible School. Maybe she slips in to the Sunday morning worship service, and disappears right after the final Amen. Maybe she’s the checkout lady you left a gospel tract with last week. Or maybe she’s the head of your congregational women’s ministry. And maybe you’d never know that the long-sleeve blouse in July isn’t just for modesty, but to cover bruised skin.

Right now, while you’re reading this, there is a woman, probably in your neighborhood, who was beaten last night by her husband or, even more likely, live-in boyfriend. And this is an abomination in the sight of a holy God.

Tougher penalties of law are necessary and overdue. Communities and neighborhoods that know one another well enough to discern when something is awry at the Jones’s are essential. Most important are churches that call men to sacrificial headship, hold predatory men to account, and exalt the dignity of women.

The Journal for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood has posted online a short editorial I wrote on the question of whether biblical male headship leads to abuse. You can access it here.

Our problem is not that we have believed too much about what Scripture teaches about male headship or the godly submission of wives. The problem is that we’ve ignored these Spirit-given truths, and cut ourselves off from a Word of God which calls on men both to recognize women as “weaker vessels” (who can be hurt, and who need protection) and as “heirs with you of the grace of life” (1 Pet 3:7 ESV).

One crucial step in addressing violence against women would be for pastors to address the issue specifically from the pulpit, identifying abuse of whatever form as satanic and calling with the authority of Christ himself abusive men to repent. It would also help for pastors to mention from the pulpit that there is a church community ready to love, receive, and help any woman who is fleeing a violent or abusive man.

Another pivotal step is to restore meaningful church discipline in our churches, including the excommunication of abusive husbands. This all must be in the context, however, of a church that takes seriously the sacrificial responsibility of male headship, and the distinctive glory of womanhood.

I think the reason we fail to address this issue more often in our churches is not because we “tolerate” abuse. Instead it is because we see abuse so clearly as aberrant and horrifying that we can’t imagine anyone listening to us might actually be abused, or an abuser. We think such things only happen to the kind of half-drunk raving households one might see on a television police reality show or perhaps in much-noticed cases such as that of O.J. Simpson, Scott Peterson, or Robert Blake. Do not be deceived.

Finally, a church can address abuse by spending some time with that little boy dropped off at Vacation Bible School, and others like him. We need to tell him Jesus loves him. We need to press the claims of the Gospel on his life.

But we also need to model for him a new way of manhood from anything he’s ever seen, to ensure that he is not part of the next generation of men apologizing to a battered woman as she readies his son for Vacation Bible School.

Only when we see how lost we are, we can find our way again. Only when we bury what’s dead can we experience life again. Only when we lose our religion can we be amazed by grace again.

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About Russell Moore

Russell Moore is Editor in Chief of Christianity Today and is the author of the forthcoming book Losing Our Religion: An Altar Call for Evangelical America (Penguin Random House).

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