What Forgiveness Is and Isn’t
— Thursday, November 17th, 2011 —
The most difficult math problem in the universe, it turns out, is 70 x 7. Perhaps the hardest thing to do in the Christian life is to forgive someone who has hurt you, often badly. But Jesus says the alternative to forgiving one’s enemies is hell.
One of the reasons this is hard for us is because we too often assume forgiving a trespasser means allowing an injustice to stand. This attitude betrays a defective eschatology. At our Lord’s arrest (Matt. 26:47-54), Jesus told Peter to put his sword back into his sheath not because Jesus didn’t believe in punishing evildoers (think Armageddon). Jesus told Peter he could have an armada of angelic warriors at his side (and one day he will). But judgment was not yet, and Peter wasn’t judge.
That’s the point.
When we forgive, we are confessing that vengeance is God’s (Rom. 12:19). We don’t need to exact justice from a fellow believer because justice has already fallen at the cross. We don’t need to exact vengeance from an unbeliever because we know the sin against us will be judged in hell or, more hopefully, when the offender unites himself to the One who is “the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world” (1 Jn. 2:2).
A prisoner of war who forgives his captor or a terminated pastor who forgives a predatory congregation, these people are not overlooking sin. Nor are they saying that what happened is “okay” or that the relationships involved are back to “normal” (whatever that is). Instead they are confessing that judgment is coming and they can trust the One who will be seated on that throne.
You don’t have to store up bitterness, and you don’t have to find ways of retaliation for what’s been done to you. You can trust a God who is just. If you won’t forgive, if you refuse to rest in God’s judgment without seeking to retaliate, it doesn’t matter what your evangelistic tracts and prophecy charts say. When it comes to the gospel and the to the end times, you’re just another liberal.
21 Responses to “What Forgiveness Is and Isn’t”
Trackbacks
- What I Read Online – 11/18/2011 (a.m.) | Emeth Aletheia
- This and That 11-18-11 « The Thompsonian Times
- Worth Reading–November 18, 2011 « Gospel Encouragement For Everyday Life
- Russell Moore on Forgiveness: « Daniel Darling, Author, Pastor, Speaker
- What Forgiveness Is and Isn’t | Time For Discernment
- The Truth About Forgiveness | Bob Pittenger
- Monday Morning Mind Dump | Student Pastor Life
- Monday Links and Bullets 11.21.11 « pastorkevinb
- Lincoln – 22 November 2011 | Trust AND Obey
- Grab bag « Words of Grace
- Points of Interests {This Week’s Must Reads} | Once Upon a Truth
- Short Sales In Utah Home
- Fobos
Forgiving does not mean excusing. Many people seem to think it does. ‘The man has broken a solemn promise.’ Exactly: that is precisely what you have to forgive. This doesn’t mean you must necessarily believe his next promise. It does mean that you must make every effort to kill every trace of resentment in your own heart- every wish to humiliate or hurt him or to pay him out.
Real forgiveness means looking steadily at the sin, the sin that is left over without any excuse, after all allowances have been made, and seeing it in all its horror, dirt, meanness and malice, and nevertheless being wholly reconciled to the man who has done it. That, and only that, is forgiveness; and that we can always have from God if we ask for it.
The injured parties do not forget even if they forgive.
The work of forgiveness has to be done over and over again. We forgive, we mortify our resentment; a week later some chain of thought carries us back to the original offence and we discover the old resentment blazing away as if nothing had been done about it at all. We need to forgive our brother seventy times seven not only for 490 offences but for one offence.
This is hard. We are also called to forgive the incessant provocations of daily life- to keep on forgiving the bossy mother-in-law, the bullying husband, the nagging wife, the selfish daughter, the deceitful son- how can we do it? Only I think, by remembering where we stand, by meaning our words when we say in our prayers ‘ Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those that trespass against us.’
To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.
“On Forgiveness” By C.S.Lewis (Fern-seed and Elephants, and Other Essays on Christianity pp.42-43)
While I appreciate the exhortation to forgive, also have some questions regarding this post. Does Jesus really tell us to forgive our enemies? Is forgiveness merely acknowledging (as important as this is) that vengeance belongs to the Lord? Certainly the Christian life does not allow for vengeance, but is not harboring bitterness the same as forgiveness? While God does not forgive unrepentant sinners, his wrath against them is fully just and right. So then, there is a way to withhold forgiveness yet remain righteous. Are we not called to follow God’s example in forgiveness (Eph 4:32)? Consider Luke 1:3-4. Notice that the condition of forgiveness here is repentance. My main point is that I think there exists a distinction between forgiveness (a relational term between two parties involving the cancellation of debts) and the importance of trusting God’s sovereignty and his ultimate justice in the world. Thoughts?
Thanks for the reminder. To rest in God’s justice (whether at the cross or future judgment) is to have peace with others.
…..but if forgiveness is real then I don’t think we should do it thinking God will “revenge” later. I know that makes it easier at first, but God keeps working on me to forgive and really pray for that person and let go more each day. This is hard when the world and your flesh says you are “justified.” Forgiveness seems to be a process rather than a one time event……
In the first year of this millenium, Christianity Today editorialized that some virtues, like forgiveness, “have undergone a metamorphis that makes them nearly unrecognizable.”
The leap outside the context of 70 X 7, which is explicitly about our relationship with our “brother,” to the subject of enemies illustrates that change. Jesus never told us to forgive our enemies. He told us to love them. On the cross, he prayed for forgiveness from His Father for those who were unwittingly crucifying their Lord and Savour in obedience to the commands of their superiors. [See I. Howard Marshall, Luke.]
The modern Christian swallows a truly liberal definition, where forgiveness swallows up other important concepts and becomes therapy for his existential angst. Repentance disappears as a key element in Jesus teaching on the subject. Not a hint is given that, as C.E.B. Cranfield writes, forgiveness and reconciliation, “though distinguishable, are inseperable.”
http://www.amazon.com/Love-Prayer-Forgiveness-Michael-Snow/dp/159467664X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1321681496&sr=1-1
At the beginning of this century, a Christianity Today editorial noted that some basic Christian virtues, like forgiveness, have “undergone a metamorphosis that makes them nearly unrecognizable.” With this one popular word, the zeitgeist tries to cover all the bases except for one. Reconciliation, a key companion to forgiveness, falls to the wayside, a victim in today’s therapeutic market.
The key context in Jesus’ admonition about “70 x 7” concerns our “brother.” He never tells us to forgive our enemies. He tells us to love them.
The oft quoted Scripture, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do,” is also ripped from its context and made the standard rule rather than the exception. Jesus does not know his executioners. They are simply fulfilling their civic duty in carrying out the commands of their superiors. He asks his Father to forgive them “on the grounds of their ignorance; their sin is unwitting–a motif familiar in Luke” (I. Howard Marshall, NIGTC).
And Jesus’ rebuke to Peter did not rest on future judgment. He had taught his disciples to love their enemies and pray for those who persecute. The sword was not the way of His Kingdom. “They that live by the sword will die by the sword” was not a ‘just wait, they will get theirs in the end’ remark.
No, our problem with forgiveness is that we want it without repentance. We want therapy, not reconciliation.
Contrary to the spirit of our times, C.E.B. Cranfield notes that forgiveness and reconciliation “though distinguishable, are inseparable,” that forgiveness “necessarily involves reconciliation.” And in the gospel of cheap grace, that fragment of gospel that is missing Jesus’ teaching about repentance, that ain’t gonna happen.
It is worth noting that forgiveness does not require passivity. The new testament does not require the Christian to maintain abusive relationships with fellow Christians. Forgiving often times requires to agree not to agree.
I think Dr Moore is correct in pointing out that peace come in conflict when we realize that the battle belongs to the Lord. Resting in God’s sovereignty to be THE judge both brings peace in knowing that I am not responsible for determining the consequences of my combatant and humbling in realizing that I too will face judgment in how I forgive or hold on to bitterness.
You don’t really know what you’re talking about until you consider the real feelings of the wounded party, the pleasure and power that they feel they are giving up by forgiving. It’s about punishment, isn’t it, about being safe in treating the other party with contempt, in relegating them to thing-hood. Basically forgiveness climbs down from the heady Sovereignty of refusing to forgiven.
Real forgiving means allowing God to take veangeance - it is “factoring” the debt to One who is much better equipped to collect it, and certainly who pays us a rich purse for the debt He buys from us.
I don’t think Jesus was forgiving the real guilty parties on the Cross - he was forgiving the ignorant soldiers doing their job. The essence of God’s forgiveness is about whether sinners “Know what they do”. And He understands that aspect far better than we do - and our need for forgiveness is something we need to trust to Him, by accepting His rules.